Friday, May 2, 2008

SE Cartel

I always had these weird thoughts, like I had a lot of money in my pocket but the bare minimum essentials are simply not there in the stores, they are nowhere, they kinda ... 'left' for want of our attention, pointing us back to that first transaction in the way of finding an alternative to barter system. "The thing's" exchange was replaced with "something else's" exchange, and ever since the attention has moved over to that "something else (SE)".

That SE evolved into a being in its own right, took the center stage, hogged the show of human race's progress which was soon to be governed, driven and assessed by its yardsticks. "Th (The thing)" took a back seat to SE and all this while Th's attention deficit secretly wended its way towards near non existence. We never let go of our obsession for and clung steadfastly to SE thru it all, so much so that it divided the whole of human race into how one set of people saw it differently than the other, the new and the only religion thereof.

We wake up now to this truth that all these years we have worried our heads over the management of SE, while good ol' Th, the food, the land, the air, the water, the earth and the human race slowly but surely crept in a spot of bother. In absence of any incentives in terms of SE to keep an eye on Th, we in this amazing self conflict know what needs to be done, but long been living in the world of SE, we seek if that conforms with the ways of SE's and we have apprehensions that it does.

I would like to add that SE was worked over by us over a long period of time, as I said it evolved into a being of its own, like other laws of life and living it outlives a man's life span or time of its influence. It lives in our institutions, persists and evolve there, institutions that stay while we pass by. The notion of SE operates in the conscious of human race, which is divided as we are all individuals, but SE is united and knows where it wants to go. Like many laws of life and living it unites us and has a say over human race but not often is the case vice versa.

It oughta be.

It made sense to work out a thing and then entrust it to govern us as we cant keep thinking things over and over again, but it seems SE’s goals are not in line with idealism, like Malthusian observation’s SE sees no value in a poor’s life, but we do as a life is a life is a life. SE has no latitude for climatic concerns, and looks like having threatening levels of affinity with Malthusian observations "...Should success be still incomplete, gigantic inevitable famine stalks in the rear, and with one mighty blow levels the population with the food of the world..." but we cant afford to be that ignorant. We need to take a pause at some point and see that these parallels converge somewhere.

Friday, March 7, 2008

The Walker Walks Off

Indian team made short work of Aussies in their 'own game'. Amidst yet untouched, by all the muck that flew high on this tour, Adam Gilchrist bid adieu to International Cricket.

One of the all time bests, this rather uncharacteristic (in his conduct, pardon my french but he would always be recognized as the the scholar amongst ruffians) Aussie is respected by Indians and Aussies alike as by Cricket lovers all over the world.

That walker reference? Well, he was the only Aussie who wouldn't wait for Umpire's signal but walk off on his own accord if he felt he was out.

Okay, let me cut Aussies some slack, he actually is the only batsman in world cricket who does that consistently, I cant think of any other, neither Indian nor any other (Dravid is pretty close, I think).

Wish you luck Gilli, looking forward to see you in IPL.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

The Orion

The Orion I looked down, the metal is still 'rubbing it in' on the concrete. Street lamps spotlights failing to hold them captive in their periphery, their walls constantly being pierced by headlights that have hardly a regard for anything, they feel not the least need to pay glance anywhere but ahead. Not long since life happened in humid warm germination conducive environment on this loose rocky pebble, a collision's remnant, it has already created things like eyes and minds that cant help but see and search what is left of saner unassuming elementary forms like germs, bacillus, algae or vacillations between animate and inanimate- viruses, they were 'the life' that 'happed' and look what they since have deformed into. 'Sanity' however has lost its relevance here -there is hardly a frame of reference, not one to be seen on this rock to say the least-so has 'saying' and everything else, not to mention. Do we really know what sanity is? We cant recognize it for the prerequisite of that, a frame of reference as I said is missing. How will we embrace it when it finally downs on us as we are so blissfully ignorant, would we be sane enough to know it? It could well be that sanity has passed us by or is there right before us, but our minds are not devices equipped enough to comprehend it. But then we don't really look for sanity, do we? We, instead, look for something that might fit conveniently into our idea of it. Much like God, whom we don't seek but instead lug aground this rigid shell for him and wait for a 'convenient' soul to walk into it. Many potential Gods before and after, in you, him or her, but no, for none fit the description in the prophecy, you know! Neither sanity nor God are for us to comprehend it seems, or is it that they are blatantly in our face, for what else could have kept it all from falling apart all this while.

On fourth floor, one of those days when I feel closer to The Orion who looks much more familiar than the things down there. My gaze at The Orion ever has been nothing but unrequited, but that's okay, I'm not quite in a mood to have a conversation myself. There from his stand point I cant put it down how we animate ones take ourselves so seriously. But than seriousness, thinking and everything else is relative too, notions originated and holding meaning on this rock and nowhere else, no wonder The Orion never cares to look back, he is hardly bothered and I couldn't agree more with him on this. He precedes this rock and everything ever happened here, including the the notion of wars and warriors, and will be there long after the rock has wound itself up, must amuse him that we address him as The Orion. 'Amusement', 'thinking', 'rock', all 'our' notions, not his, but we cant get rid of them, right, not to mention 'precede' as well, as time again could well be an entity meaningful only to us. I look at him still as I wanna tell him what's it like being held prisoner on this rock where you don't have the right to remain silent. I wish, again a relative notion, but I do I was where he is, and could just think and sit and watch or not even do that and never say anything you know, bliss! I'm stuck,however, between The Orion and the metal. Or I'm the Orion but on the rock and I'm not allowed solitude and silence anymore, as you are not supposed to have them when you are on the rock. That's fine for earthlings, in general, but .. It could well be that The Orion has jettisoned me from that coveted adobe. I don't know but I yearn to get back. I'm sure I don't belong here. How could I possibly?

Listening to

Chopin Piano Sonata No.2

Friday, February 15, 2008

A One Of Its Kind Valentine's Day Wedding Plan

There just outside where they are practicing hard for Sunday's match against Aussies, wedding bells can be heard for every session, its a busy day at the cathedral at the brink of the park brimming with marry making, giggles, flowers, wedding vows, happy beginnings or endings.. its V day, and its beyond me, beats me, I mean if you are in love, you can make any day a special one, if you are not, this day V day, that day, new years, yesterday, Tuesday, Friday, a day on Mercury or Jupiter, an earthling's day or that of an alien or any day for that matter is not
for you. Your sole hope lies in tomorrow, and you don't foster much hope in me as to what kind of human being you are. I feel especially for those singles who get all worked up around this day. Don't make a joke of yourself. Oh I'm so happy for these newly weds, did I mention?

Back in Delhi, these people, these self proclaimed flag bearers of Hinduism, they are allegedly getting any couple spotted celebrating V Day, married. Bajrang Dal or some such name they go by, well I would surely like to read the preamble of this organization or whatever it is as Lord Hanuman was a Bal Brahamchari, and these people are keener on playing wedding planners!

Cost cutting ?

I can only imagine if they were in Mathura in those days, they would have gotten Lord Krishna married to all Gopies, Radha and who not. The notion of unconditional unnamed love and devotion is too much for them I figured some jobs ought to be reserved for such people, jobs that don't have high cerebral demands where they could make a living, and not do what they are doing in all likelihood trying to eke out an existence.

This probably is the only instance I would have spoken in favor of reservation of any description, but I think it will be in the country's best interest as well those of these people if they are put where they belong and not let the wiseacres of subsistence politics use them to make a mockery of all the wise and wisdom this religion's history is replete with.

On a more serious note,
I personally don't like the word religion as its seen in a different light today, has a darker connotation to it, has been appropriated by such people. I think Hinduism is a philosophy, of living, a way of life. I try and live by it.

Monday, February 4, 2008

Did A Cartoon: Microsoft's offers to Yahoo, "Join forces and we might overtake Google"

From Playful

How do ya like it?
More of my artist self on this blog in Artistically Challenged :)

Friday, February 1, 2008

Microsoft's $44.6 billion offer to Yahoo: Join bladders, out piss Google ;)

Microsoft the tom had been pacing up and down the bark, when Yahoo the kitten (some call him Jerry (Yang) the mouse;)) shimmied up to join him.

MS - "The coyote seems to have lost control of his bladder.".

"Morning. Talking about Google, yeah, what an odd name."

"Tell me about it, these odd named oddities are a pain in my ass."

The kitten sort of stiffened, "Am.. his bladder is growing too, you were saying.."

"I knew it, rate at which his bladder is inflating augers ill for me..us. We kept fighting over trespassing on one other's piss marked territories while it was he who's been piss marking most of our territories."

"That's a bit thick."

"I thought about sending for him, but he is peeing constantly like a fountain, converts whoever I send. I've been meaning to talk to you about this offer, exclusively worked out for you, join forces I say, our synergies will help re piss mark the territories we are loosing to the big bladder." said the tom looking at the kitten in a proprietary sort of way.

"You mean be bought out to you?"

"If you say so."

"Well....let me sleep over it."

"I feel bad for your under sizes bladder, mine is bigger than yours, and I stink more than you do, I might stink shoo people in your territory to my territory. Solitude should help your sleep."

"I'm seeing already the brighter sides of joining under you. But I cant help wondering why people like him so much."

"They don't so mush as they hate us. We stink."

"How could he not be stinking yet, he's been around for a while now."

"He is going stale, people prefer stale over stinking. But if we join our bladders, together we might have enough to out piss him anyway."

"But he is better still, and we stink."

"That don't matter as long as we are not leaving him no space to pee on. Together we might reclaim what was ours, and while we are on it we might as well claim what's his."

"Like you said, you stink"

"I've never bothered exploring uncharted territories on my own, like you said he is better, I let better people work, after which I take over, I'm good at it, you just tag along.

"I'm not sure. I might join him and let him do all the peeing. He is good."

"You need solitude."

"To pee or not to pee that is the question."

"Pee we must or people might get a sniff of fresh air, that's an anathema, we cant risk it, people might get delirious. Pee we must while we are still the only three known options for them. Pee we must, together we shall out piss the new kid."

I have to say there is no ill intention behind this persiflage that came into being when we were discussing this news:)

I was ruing this worthless text as it almost spoiled the spirit of the good cartoon, I maintain the news has nothing in it as of now to merit more than one post, that is why I crammed the cartoon in here. I now think the news might not have enough to beget two posts but the cartoon could do with a post of its own, so I moved it, SheTell, I wish I could move your kind comment too, your comments, however, matter regardless of where you leave 'em :)

Friday, January 11, 2008

Tata Nano : Cheapest Car in the World, Specifications, Pictures

A miffed car thief was heard quoting this big daddy proverb, "It doesn't matter how much you paid for the car, they all look the same after the wreck." ha ha, those into "car-or-dismantled-car-reselling business" have every reason to sulk as Tata unveils the much awaited Nano, the within-reach car aiming at common man (No No by aiming I don't mean its gonna chase after one to mow him down) here at Auto Expo 2008, New Delhi. For once, we might get to see R.K. Laxman's proverbial Common Man smiling.

Okay

Let me put aside these lame attempts at pun in favor of something really worth a smile, check out the new kid on the block:)


Specifications: The young kid has a big heart (or belly), Tata has been assuring people that although its smaller by 8% without as compared to its closest rival Maruti 800, its 21% more spacious within as compared to the same. To be precise its 3.1 metes (10.23 feet) long, 1.5 meters wide and 1.6 meters high, can seat four people comfortably, five -conditions apply :)- while six are likely to get frowned upon, but you never know. Draws on a two cylinder 623 cc, 33 horsepower rear mounted, multi-point fuel injection, all aluminum, petrol engine. Can reach the highest speeds of 105 kilometers/hour. It had to be fuel efficient, 20 kilometers/liter is Tata's claim, can be seen as its biggest USP. It more than satisfies all Indian regulatory requirements regarding pollution and safety.

Price: Well, that's the cause célèbre... in a positive way that is, the standard model is priced at Rs 1,00,000 (2,500 dollars approx). Add VAT, transport costs etc to that, and on road price should be Rs 1,20,000 about. The two Deluxe models with AC and some other features will be only slightly costlier although there is no final word from the company as of yet in this regard.

Looks? Well, have a look yourself :)

The Standard Model

The Deluxe Model

Nano's Interiors (somewhat disemboweled :( )


Reactions
I was reading about it in paper (TOI) this morning, it appears the kid has hardly arrived and it has already ruffled a few feathers in automobile industry, some (mixed) reactions it elicited from the who's who of the industry..

"It can seat five people...if no one breathes," ABC News anchor Charlie Gibson.

"Upstart econobox.", Time.

"Automotive journalists had traveled from the four corners of the globe too see a golf cart crossed with a jelly bean.", Popular Mechanics.

"C'mon, it's practically smiling,", a Wired magazine correspondent.

"Ultimate reverse status symbol.", MotorTrends.

[ source : TNN ]


last but not the least, and although I don't quite qualify for "who's who" here is my reaction once again ;)

"For once, we might get to see R.K. Laxman's proverbial Common Man smiling.", Playfullive.com

Monday, December 24, 2007

Santa Claus : Calling from North Pole

From Playful

How do ya like it?
More of my artist self on this blog in Artistically Challenged :)

Merry Christmas!

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Syndicated Comics - Some Ground Work - II

Submission guidelines

All comics syndicate sites' submission guidelines pages say in essence the following

...most comic strip cartoonists draw their daily comic strips 13" wide by 4" tall. Most single-panel cartoonists draw their daily panel 7" wide by 7" high, not counting the extra space for the caption placed underneath the drawing. You can draw larger or smaller than that, as long as your cartoons are in proportion to those sizes.

...

Send 24 black and white daily comic strips. It is not necessary to send Sunday comic strips. If we like your daily comics, we will ask to see sample Sunday pages.

...

You should reduce your comics to fit onto standard 8-1/2" x 11" sheets of paper. Write your name, address and phone number on each page. Do not send your original drawings! Send photocopies instead.

There is no need to send your work in any other format. Due to the enormous amount of submissions we receive, it’s easiest on us if the work is kept to 8-1/2” x 11”, bound with a paper clip or a staple. We would prefer not to receive large binders or portfolios.

- King Features

...

It is fine to include color work if you care to, but be certain to include some black & white line art as well.

...

If you would like your submission returned, you must include a self-addressed stamped envelope (SASE). If you would like confirmation that your submission was received and reviewed, you must also include a SASE. If no SASE is included, we will respond only to submitters from whom we would like to see more material.

- United Features

Marvel Comics submission guidelines differ a bit in keeping that they are more into action hero type comics. Marvel accepts artwork thru emails as well. Submission guideline page on the sites of the three biggies of the industry ..

United Features

Marvel Comics

King Features

Writing ability

The best take home message from these submission guidelines pages

...we very carefully study a cartoonist's writing ability. Good writing helps weak art, better than good art helps weak writing.

- King Features

Its an important message coming from the people who returned Scott Adams strips on account of his drawing inaptitude ;)

It worked out fine for Adams though, as aggressive and agile United Features fitted better in his scheme of things later. You, for once, might give it to King's people for turning down Adams strips if you have a look at the quality of sketching in the strips he sent to them (its clear Adams didn't take the drawing aspect seriously enough), his sense of humor and his amazing imagination, however, is hard to miss even in those few strips. King's people did acknowledge his potential as a writer but it took United Features alertness to act upon it.

Before you submit

Now one thing that you must have noticed about these submission guidelines pages is their Google page ranks. It is 6, 5, and 4 for United Features, Marvel, and King Features respectively, which is partly due to the traffic on the index and comic pages that often visits other pages of these websites as well. Point is, thousands and thousands of people see these pages every day. This is only a tip of the ice burg

....Each year, it gets more than 5,000 submissions of which three are chosen for syndication.

- King Features

So many people submitting so little getting selected. The only thing that tops that is that oldies are not willing to leave either. Comics like Dennis the Menace and many others have been kept alive as either juniors in the family have taken over or assistants or fallow artist groups are doing that. But don't let these facts get you down. What it does mean though is that you have to put your best foot forward. Every submitted page contributes in making or breaking you. Each page of comic strip, with your contact info on it, represents you and nothing else matters. Be original, which is possible only if you be yourself. You have to be yourself as you cant last trying to be somebody else.

You need to choose the subject and characters with utmost care as once you have these basic element worked out, not only you have them but they have you. You've got to be in love with your comic strip characters as only love lasts. Try to differentiate between love and infatuation as they say for if you are lucky enough to have your comic rolling it will engage you and then there is not way out should you grow weary of it.

Draw 60 odd strips

These syndications ask for only 24 odd samples but I suggest that you must have 2 months of strips with you before you submit. Its better that way as you would know if you are serious enough by the time you've drawn those many. Also If you need some radical changes done, you have time for that before your comic is not entirely yours. I'm almost feeling sorry to say this, but by 60 odd comic strips I mean 60 odd 'best ones' for which you would obviously need more than 60 ideas to chose the best ones from. Drawing these many strips will give you an opportunity to analyze your enthusiasm levels. Its okay if you are not really elated and feeling a little exhausted and saturated by the time you've finalized the first best 60, but if you are already groping about for ideas you'd know you have not quite identified your calling and drawing or doing something that you don't really identify with. My fist post might help you with your choices of subjects and characters.

Syndicates might take couple of months or more before you receive a word from them (you are in, your work aint good enough or an acknowledgment of any kind for that matter), having 60 odd strips with you allows you to start a webcomic and keep updating it while you are cooling your heals. If your comic hits it off with readers you would have some sort of credentials to point these syndicates to. It matters if you already have some fan following. While many don't say it openly, Marvel encourages you to mention it if you are already running a web comic. This way or that way you'll have your comic up and running, then it will be your decision whether you want your comic syndicated at all or you wanna concentrate solely on your webcomic. In my future posts, I'll cover web comics and how you can start one cheaply and have it up and rolling :)

Resources

  • A good compilation of resources for all comic aspirants
  • An online book on AOL servers Cartoonists - How They Work.
  • I figured most of us draw comic not merely for the love of it. There are comics for artists and there are those for people, what I'm trying to say is better said by Scott Adams here.
  • Understanding Comics: The Invisible Art by Scott Mccloud a book that's worth its weight in gold. Its a comic book. Yes its written as a comic where the protagonist representing the writer walks you thru the tricks of the trade while making you richer with interesting facts from the history of comics , observations, working styles of various giants many other things.

Take care :)

Monday, December 17, 2007

Syndicated Comics - Some Groundwork - I

I think there are two broad categories of comics. Ones with a protagonist on the fore and others without one.

Between Friends, Peanuts, Garfield etc. they fall in the first category while, Frank and Ernest, Dilbert, Wizard of ID although have characters, are more about quips on situations and are less personal in nature.

With protagonists on the fore

You naturally go this way when you want to give your personal opinions a free expression. You wanna laugh at thing without worrying about others. Your comic character represents your uninhibited self, and as you can record even your character's thoughts in the thought balloons, its not just actions but thoughts as well, that you can polish into a comic strip.

They say to draw a comic is tedious only until you start drawing one. Key is to develop the character and live with it till you begin to identify with him/her and see him/her in your head. You need to cultivate it and bring it to life. One proven way of doing that is to draw you character in various poses, and keep drawing it till you've covered all possible gestures your character is capable of. Once that happens, the character takes over and starts giving you stories.

In every ordinary situation you would be able to see your character doing something extra ordinary which may be amusing to your readers. His reactions, his shenanigans, it would be like recording a persons's actions, like Garfield, even some of his mute strips are amusing, as his facial gestures alone can make you laugh your socks off. Or Between Friends, where the protagonist often has a lot of cheeky and some times kinky thoughts.

You would actually have more ideas than you would need, out of which you need to choose the ones that you think are most appealing and hilarious. Such, comic if treated well get a huge fan following over a period of time, we know a certain Mr Schultz who was sooo rolling in the stuff thanks to snoopy and other members of Charlie brown gang.

Having said that I'll say all the action hero, crime fighter, mysterious vigilante comics fall into this category. The comics with such characters depend heavily on their presentation aspect for their success as very rightly put by The Riddler: "The difference: showmanship!"

With protagonists as observers

You would naturally go for such types if its more the situations that drive you crazy than any one person. You might have a huge collection of situational anecdotes that you recorded over a period of time in your profession like Scott Adams did who, by the way, now also happens to have at his disposal sources like blogs reader, emails etc to help him with ideas.

You could also be a natural with certain joke types like word play, and a genius like Frank and Ernest's Thaves who have always been the trend setters and first ones to have done many things in the world of comics strips, digitally colouring comics amongst one of them.

Last but not the least you could be a really creative thinker like Brant Parker (Wizard of ID) I so found it hard not to cry when my friend pointed me to that news on net that said Parker is no more, I don't know him in person but it felt like a big lose. These comics have real philosophers behind them, the ones who are able to see the funny side of gravest of situations, who are able put across to you the gravest of messages along with a quip on the superficiality associated with them.

These people and comics are revolutionaries of sorts. In these comics the protagonists are more often the observers or victims (on occasions they are simply absent) and act as your spectacles into situations. Such comics have heavy literary demands but personally, as an artist, I see more satisfaction in them.

Others

Then there are ones like Calvin and Hobbes and Frazz that you can keep somewhere between these two extremes as you would see the protagonists shenanigans running the show most of the times but once in a while he takes a back seat to a quip that's entirely philosophical in nature, I can quote as examples the musings, the questions Calving would put up to Hobbes during their leisurely walks, that Hobbes answered and Calvin piped out a Othello-esque observations on.

More in part two of this article in which I'll cover the mental preparations before you set about making a comic book and also a few facts pertaining comic syndicates.

Sunday, December 16, 2007

My MS Paint Antics: A Netizen's Evening

I keep an instance of MS Paint open on my comp all the time. I use it to write myself short notes, reminders, rejoinders to those reminder (like - you are talking to me?..), and to doodle. You might say the bmps must be taking a hell lot of space on my hard drive, well yes, the new ones in plush posh neighborhoods called 'folders' and the old ones in a dark alley called the recycle bin. I regularly empty my recycle bin.

There are a lot of software utilities around for writing notes but I find this particularly a fun way of taking notes, by the way you know what Hypergraphia is? Are you into taking notes on paper, awkward way of asking it, but are you? ......Leave it.... getting back to what I was saying I was caught once engulfed in MS Paint, (not writing myself notes) I was doodling.

How do ya like it

From Playful

I surfaced to what I would describe as 'a kiddy chaos', I figured you are not supposed to doodle (a lot) at work. I don't know why, but at that very moment I decided a retake and record this time the process and put it up on a display where a few more people would be able to see it.

Hence, the following video....



MS Paint Antics - The best bloopers are here

Hope you'll like it :)



More of my artist self on this blog in Artistically Challenged :)

 

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